Second City Network

Chai Chat: The Fitness Talk with My Indian Parents

Away at college, Priyanka Patel gets workout and fitness advice from her Indian parents via a Facebook video. Shared words of wisdom over a great cup of chai tea. It’s calorie-free, you know…chai tea.

And here are Priyanka’s best workout tips for all you muscle heads out there:

PRIYANKA’S TOTAL-BODY SHRED

You spent all winter saying you’d work on your perfect beach body. But July is here, and you haven’t done shit. Don’t panic. It’s not too late. In fact, you might be working out right now and just don’t know it. Here are some things I consider exercise:

TOTAL BODY

Roll around in your bed by yourself. Get tangled in your sheets. Untangle yourself. Fall asleep, wake up, and repeat.

LEGS

Walk to Pizza Hut to pick up your Pizza Sliders instead of getting them delivered. I’m usually so excited to eat, it turns into a brisk speed walk.

HANDS

Change channels during every single commercial. My right thumb be lookin’ fiiiiine.

ARMS

Shampoo your hair, take a five-minute cool-down, and then condition it. Rinse and repeat.

HEART

Watch Simon Birch. And Love, Actually. And My Girl. And think about the fact that Michael Clark Duncan is no longer with us.

MOUTH

Taffy. Taffy. Toffee. Taffy.

ABS

Let a cat crawl on top of you in the middle of the night.

BUTT

Order the Pintos ‘n’ Cheese from Taco Bell. Feel the aftermath.

BACK

Wear three pairs of Spanx to the beach, stand in the water, and try not to let the waves knock you down.

Do these exercises multiple times a day and you’ll get the summer bod you want. I know I did. I like to hide mine under sweatpants and an oversized Tasmanian Devil t-shirt.

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